Earlier today I was reflecting on the past couple of months, I try to do so often. I look back to measure growth and to help make better decisions in the future. I believe I speak for myself and others when I say, all I want is to live a peaceful and happy life. But sometimes I fear I don’t truly know how to measure happiness. I am the kind of person that lets my surroundings impact me rather than impact my surroundings. I studied myself over the years and noticed that, so I came up with habits that I believe helped me to impact my surroundings rather than the opposite.
Take sometime to look within yourself and be comfortable with that person. Sometimes because we don’t know who we are, we think we are not good enough. We try to conform to our surroundings and blend in with everyone else. Though it’s sometimes good to mingle with the crowd, it’s never good to become the crowd. Take for example being in university, it’s good to be a part of an institution that helps to cultivate and teach you about life. Yet it’s not good to become the eight or nine digit number they assign to you as your student number. You are not only a student, you are other things, and more than one role defines you. You have to ask yourself the tough questions and figure out who you are. Then accept you, good and bad, change what you can by learning and accept what you can’t and be graceful.
Often evaluate yourself so that you can understand your environment and understand yourself. Knowing your environment, knowing yourself and where you stand in the world around you is important because that’s how you get better at making decisions. Try to find tangible ways of evaluating your progress. Writing a journal works for me because it helps me document my experiences and sometimes my process of decision-making. I Detail goals I have and update them periodically, changes in my finances, habits I want to change about myself and lessons I have learned.
The most important thing is to walk in your truth be who you are because you are beautiful and fearfully made, but be willing to make changes when you need to. Sometimes we have bad habits that are detrimental to us and our surroundings, but we find excuses not to change them. “This is me, this is who I am, take it or leave it”. You can hang on to that philosophy but reality is people will leave. No one wants to be around people with bad attitudes and habits that aren’t willing to change, and they shouldn’t have to be. Don’t find excuses for your bad habits, take control and change them.
Trust God to work on your behalf, he has a plan for you. He is concerned about every aspect of our lives, there’s no less or more important for him. I try to commit even the small situations to him and ask for guidance where I fall short. Trust him more when you’ve tried but your ego is getting in the way, or you may not even understand the weight of what you are doing and how it can affect other’s around you. He sends answers through people around, by bringing it to mind even when I am not thinking about it or revealing it in the bible or a book. Gradually after making these changes, I noticed a change that was coming from the inside and I became less influenced by what was happening around me. Instead of the outside forces around influencing and affecting who I am, the inside person began to create impact outwardly and changes took place. Even though my situation hasn’t changed, I look at situations from a different perspective, respond differently and others started adapting to the new me which helped me to be more comfortable with who I am.